My Life So far..

Right now, I’m at my cousin’s place, waiting to get my hair done.  This is the first time that I’ve actually been here considering that they’ve moved here for about 5 years now.

Anyways, I don’t actually know what’s going to be done but I really shouldn’t complain..All this is for free!!Yes,Free!!My aunt(Eztelle Roche Kaye) is the main player in this hair game.  Whenever I need a new hairstyle,colour etc, I just pick up the phone & call her & walah, hair will get done!!

Right now, she’s applying the "blue paste" onto my hair & wrapping it in foil..sigh..the things we girls do to ourselves..I wonder how long it’s going to take though. I can’t stand the thought of just sitting down in a chair for more than 2 hours. 

Anyway, enjoy the pix of me looking like a …..heh,u tell me what I look like,aite!!

Bwahahar!!

Last night, most of the Bartley staff had a KTV session.  Main reasons were to welcome back,say safe journey & happy birthday.

1)Welcome back, Ram who was away for more than 2 weeks..

2)Safe Journey, Nura who will be leaving  this Saturday for a minimum duration of one month for China.

3)Happy Birthday, Gao Liang & Patrick(although he was a no-show)..

Anyway, the session lasted till about midnight but it was pretty fun.  I am so not a singer but yesterday, I was on a roll!! I didn’t really care what songs they were or how I sounded..all I did was just sing the way I usually sing at work-which pretty much means like a goddamn tone deaf, psycho maniac!!

P.S:I don’t know why but I couldn’t put my camera down!!Check out the pix..

(Currently listening to ‘Born to Hand Jive’..damn, it brings back memories) 

It’s gonna be September in about 4 days & it’s the time of the year where it’s packed with birthdays & surprise visits from my parents…

What I’ve heard thru’ the family grapevine is that my parents & my lil’ siblings are coming home soon!!Clean Up house time!!Let’s see if I can do this..thank god, I’ve ‘washed’ the kitchen..but still I guess it’s time to "disappear".  I don’t think I can face my mum & all the interrogating that comes along. Ergh, too scary to deal with.  Afterall, I’m in a very,very delicate state of mind right now..hehehe…run lil piggy,run!!

The BirthdaY Li$T:

My lil’ bro, Zoran is turning 9 on 0609, my 1st bro,Papabear(that’s wat his close friends call him) turns 29 on 0909, my 2nd bro, Silversurf(he’s a typical surfer dude-think Keanu) turns 27 on 1009, Zoey(my colleague-the one with the shoe prob)turns 2_ on 2009,Amal(one of my best friend)turns 2_ on 2509 & Of cos, Kenn( one of the BJ FreakZ) turns 28 on 2809…

If there’s anyone’s birthday that I’ve missed out, sorry lar, minta maaf, wo dao qian..let me know & I promise to try & remember…my only excuse for forgetting..

"I"M OLD ALREADY DAH!!"

Nitey Nite.

I recently found some ex-schoolmates on friendster & I was very surprised at how everyone still looked the same.  No doubt it’s been over 8 years but really, it was great to be able to see that I have not been forgotten by people.

Annie Chew & Chitra, thank you for adding me.  I remember we used to have quite a few laughs in school! Me as the weird Malay girl who always hung around the Chinese classmates..

Yong Fatt, my friend from Sec sch till ITE..damn,boy..sorry I didn’t make to effort to stay in touch..you had been one of the better guys in class who used to either help protect me when required or one of the guys who "saboed" me during my birthday(never will I forget being surrounded by you & the other 8-9 guys & having eggs & water & flour thrown on me!!)

Shikin, the girl with the same name  in the same class as me..what I remember was that the teacher used to call us by our fathers’ names..remember all the weird stares we got when she did it in front of people?heheh…

Anise, my dear,dear "xiaomei" in school..the crazy lil’ babe who could speak chinese to me..who was nice to me when others were mean..the one who liked calling me "Ashik Cina"..

Wow, all the people that I’ve gotten to know in school..

Anyways, to all the others from Min Xin Pri, Ping Yi Sec, ITE MP/TP..even though I didn’t mention all of you, please know that in some way or another, you guys have in a way contributed to "moulding" me the way I am today. Thank you..

*Just trying to see how many people I can remember from 1987 up till 1996. Here goes*

"Tuziah,Nurhuda,Noraidah,Noradilah,Erna,Kamaruddin,XuSheng,Fadzil,Angeline,Rehana,Aidil,Farhan..

Shahidah,Haslin,Norain,Elfa,Sabrina,Favian,SalihinNurzana,Farhani,Shiying,Angelina,

Rohaimi,Dian,Shirin,Zul,Faisal,Raihan,Is,Sharul,Cynthia,Yaser,Sharifah,Shalini,Rozita,Jason..oh my god,I can go on & on & on & on..

Yet, Shida, Dzul,Wan,Is bulu,Dewi,Rafi,Tika,Ana,Diana,Yan,Faizal,Eugene,Navin,Adrian,Vic,Titi,Zul G,Ebot,Saiful,Miza,Razlyn,Yati P,Rauf,James,..ok,enuf..too tired…"

 When I was in Beijing, I used to hang out at this coffee place called "The Coffee Beanery" at Xiandaicheng Soho. It was ok by my standards but something has be done about the music choice(usually I get to hear the same song more than 5 times over the span of 2 hrs).

Anyways, I was there last Saturday waiting for some parents to come & see me. While waiting, I started reminiscing about the ‘good old days’ when Lee, Yuko,Quinn,Kenn & I used to sit around waiting for each other or just chill out.  I had never been much of a talker with new friends but these guys made it real easy for me.  We could sit around for hours just talking about everything & anything under the sun.  Usually the guys would be their usual selves(geeks) & start talking about gaming, setting up the band(F.I.S.T - Fingers In the Shape of This) while Yuko & I would just talk about girlie stuff. Or me & Quinn would just sit & have coffee while waiting for Lee & Yuko. Thinking about all this made me realise how much I miss those days. 

Recently, I’ve found myself thinking about all the things that I’ve done so far. There are certain things that I’ve done that has made me feel good about myself eg. the fact that I managed to "survive" in China for more than 6 months & of course there are other things which I’m not sure I should have done but did anyways…Then it hit me. All these things have helped open up my eyes to the world out there.

I have decided that no matter what happens, I’m not going to sweat it.  I’ll just take it one step at a time.   

To all you Beijing freakz & geekz(you all know who you are), thank you for making my life in Beijing bearable. I love you guys.

I’m currently in the smoking room in Beijing International Airport,just staring at the planes & looking at the cleaning ‘ayis’ who have fallen asleep on the seats(no doubt tired due to obnoxious working hours).

My body feels drained this time round,physically & emotionally. I feel sorry for Zoey who came on this trip with me. She suffered as much if not more than me. First gastrics, then sore throat, then fever.  I guess Beijing does not agree with her. 

We’ve had the weirdest things happen to us.

1) One of Zoey’s soles fell off her shoe at Changi Airport. We just couldn’t stop laughing. 
2) The flight was delayed due to "technical problems" according to the head stewardess.
3) Both of us couldn’t really sleep during the flight.
4) When we got to BJ Airport, some guy tried to get us to take his cab & wanted to charge us  "cheap" @ RMB 500. We basically told him in a nice way to "Fuck Off".
5) Twice, we got into a cab only to be told that the driver didn’t know where we were heading towards (despite me explaining where)
6) The other sole fell off Zoey’s shoe fell off later that night.
7) We left on 08/14, got room no. 814, Ram got 408 & Ed got 1408..(Ram was joking earlier that since we got the above room numbers, maybe Ed would get room number 1408(the damn thing came true later when Ed checked into the hotel!!)

I tell you, it’s just weird!!Ill write more later tonight.

Ahhh..I’m sitting at McDonald’s Plaza Singapura trying to gather my thoughts together for the trip(I’m leaving for China again tomorrow but only for 10 days this time) & just watch people walk by..

I miss my Beijing geeks & freaks…sigh…

I wanna go to The Coffee Beanery with you(u know who u are)!!!I wanna go clubbing!!!I wanna go drinking!!!

Breathe..breathe..sigh..

  I had this conversation earlier with my colleagues today:

Mo: "When I first saw you, I thought you were unfriendly"

Me: "Yeah, that’s what people tell me. Usually the favourite descriptions are "Bitch,Stuck-up, Too Serious & well, Bitch.."

Vern: "Yeah, I remember seeing you the first time & I thought you were this really unfriendly,serious girl"

*Just to say that I don’t remember the exact words we said to each other but the above pretty much covers it..*

See what I mean.  That’s the vibe I give out. Then I realised something.  In S’pore, I would always be perceived as a "bitch" because of the way I am.  The way I behave, talk & even look..people immediately see the bad side.  How many people can actually say that they know me, the real me?

These thoughts have been stuck in my head for god knows how long.  Every time I tell myself not to think about it, it keeps climbing back up from this lil’ space that I’ve set aside for thoughts like this(negative thoughts,"I’m fat,I’m fat & ugly..I shouldn’t have done something like that etc."

I’ve done things that I’m not proud of but I learnt from my mistakes.  I know everyone has gone through shit at some point in their lives that they’re not proud of but that’s them. I’m..well, I’m me. 

I could go on but I’m just going to end this here & just try & get the evil thoughts out of my head…

By the way,I’m in one of my rambling moods…..

I just came back from watching a midnight show, "Charlie & the Cholate Factory" with Wik. Well, not as good as I expected it to be but rather enjoyable..If anyone decides to watch it, make sure that you pay attention to the Oompah-Loompahs.Cute in a freakish kinda way.

My plans for tonight were actually simple. I was gonna either go clubbing or play pool. Clubbing eventually became out of the question due to lack of "manpower", most of the gang had things to do.  With that out of the way, I thought," Cool, pool sounds good.." but then the waiting list was too long at my favourite place so I gave up.  I was walking around when I saw the cinema so there, I just bought tickets & got nachos(my favourite movie snack choice,by the way) & enjoyed the movie.

Right now, I’m playing "online aunt agony" to a student of mine. Sigh..the usual "I hate people" shit. These kids really need to learn that they just need to get along & remember what’s important….

"WORLD PEACE"…

I’m sitting at the ‘designated smoking area’ at work right now & feeling really jumpy. Why? Cos right now, it’s raining pretty heavily & there’s lightning & thunder, two of several things that I don’t really enjoy…

In the span of 5 minutes, I’ve had a couple of shocks due to the thunder..I just don’t like them. I keep thinking that the lightning’s gonna strike me down one day. All because it almost happened to me when I was younger.

First time was when I was probably about a little girl of 8 years. There I was happily playing with my toys at the main gate of my grandma’s place when suddenly this bolt of lightning struck barely 10 metres away from me!! Now, I remember clearly that I almost peed in my pants & that night I had a high fever due to the shock. Second time was when I was about 17. I was in school,walking along the corridor when lightning struck,again, about 10 metres away. This time, I ended up crying & shaking in class for at least 2 hours..I was that scared!!

Since then, I’ve dreaded being outside when the weather’s like this…sigh…weird thing is, I’ve done some of the most wonderful things on days like this(what I’ve done during these moments shall remain a secret)…shoot…i better go hide now..don’t want to tempt fate…